Overcome the Loss of the First Love?

Is this good or bad? 

I read this week morning revival messages one shot just now before the meeting. @@

I was very exposed when I came to Day 4 message where it talked about the overcoming of the loss of the first love. 

I was really struggling especially when I read the related two verses:

John 14:23 Jesus answered and said to him, If anyone loves Me,

he will keep my Word, and My Father will love him, 

and We will come to him and make an abode with him.

Revelation 2:4 But I have one thing against you,

that you have left your first love.  

I took exam as an excuse of not reading the Word of God. But the messages this week really really exposed me, where I'm enlightened that we need to be washed through the water in the word. All our spots (something out of the natural life) and wrinkles (signs of oldness) need to be washed away metabolically by the living water. The more we come to the Word, the more we are nourished. Hmm... No wonder I felt so dry... 

And just now, before the meeting, I just wrote a new record on the game I've been "practising" on for the past few days. It was a game I played few years ago, but couldn't have any breakthrough, but today I made it @@ I was really excited and felt a sense of archievment, *shame on me* I really need to repent and turn to the Lord. Lord, please save me. The only thing that Lord against us is that we have left our first love. The Lord loves us unceasingly, but we always forget him and replace him with other passions. Another verse that also enlightened me a lot, is Roman 8:37, But in all things we more than conquer through Him who loved us. We will conquer everything, even tribulation through the Lord, but often, I just like to depend on myself. I don't like to be weak, it makes me so inferior =.=

O, Lord, please expose me more.... I'm too weak, I need you...