Saturday, March 31, 2007

The Sweet Escape of Friday Night

Time is ticking away(not really as I don't have analog clock beside me, Wahaha). Time indeed is flying.

Argh, what am I doing? PROCRASTINATING...

I should sleep or do some parts of Web Page Design Assignment now...

This week is really torturing for me. I went college 7.30am and reached home at 7pm everyday. I'm really exhausted, but still I'm here writing blog and reading others' blogs..

Perhaps this is a sweet escape from reality(at least for these few hours) before I start 'laboring' tomorrow... Argh...

Procrastination is the thief of time. I understand but still I'm doing something against it(I was so determined to eliminate my bad habit, procrastinating early this year).

It's 1.28am now, I wonder why am I still here? A sweet escape? Haha..

Friday, March 30, 2007

An old article to share

Thursday, March 29, 2007

Waiting to Collapse =.=

ermm, why am I still here writing blog? Supposedly I should sleep now. I tried to sleep just now, but simply I found myself to be so alert. In fact my body has already sent me signal to get a rest. My back is very painful, the muscle seems like burning... Is is stress that causes me to be like that? There are really too many stuffs waiting for me, all are urgent. Time management is the only thing I hope I can master to get the situation better. If I still do thing according to my "mood", I don't even dare to think of the consequence. =.=

By the way, I hope this alertness can maintain till my exam is over. I shall take more chicken essence to keep myself from collapsing.

College life is not as relaxed as I thought...

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Seeking Balance between Studying and Relaxing

I'm being compressed. I'm being confined to a "dark room". I find myself hardly breathing.

Yea, I'm totally worn out, there are too much stuff to be done. I just passed up Management Studies Assignment on this Monday. For the coming Thursday, I will have Management Studies Presentation which I really don't like, I don't like to talk in front of so many people, I don't like to wear formal suit. I have drama on next Tuesday, today only we started rehearsing. Next Friday, I have to pass up Web Page Design Report and do presentation. The following day, I have Web Page Design Test2 which covers 3 topic(200 pages of the text book!). Though drama is fun, I'm still afraid, I never act, I'm so "rigid", I have no expression. :(

By now, I'm seeking balance between studying and relaxing. How to relax? Yoga? Exercise? Blog? I think blogging suits me the most, I'm crazy about blogging now. WAHAHA... There are a few friends influenced by me and go creating a blog as well. Hehe... Blogging seems to be the popular activity among us now.

Anyway, I feel much better now as I could escape from the "dark room" for a while, I saw light in blogging... I just hope that the following week passes as soon as possible... By then, I think I can shout out loud to vomit all the pressure stuck inside me...

Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Achieving against all odds

"We are not able to choose when to start our lives, but we must be brave enough to walk to the end of our lives!" I saw this in my friend's msn status, suddenly this made me to recall another inspirational story told by my Management Studies lecturer today.

The character of today's story was Wilma Rudolph, one who was best-known to be the first American woman to get 3 medals in one Olympic Games. She was born pre-matured and weighted 4.5 pounds only. She was from a poor family, with father worked as a railroad porter and handyman, while mother did housekeeping for wealthy white men. They were barely able to make the ends meet by making girls' dresses out of flour sacks. Wilma Rudolph was from really a big family, as the 2oth child of 22 siblings! She was a rather weak kid, suffering from illness one after another like chicken pox, measles, mumps, scarlet fever and double pneumonia which led polio.

Polio is the world's most dreaded disease, there was no cure for it until 1955. Most children contract with polio will either die or never walk again. Click here to get more information about polio.

As a consequence of racial segregation, Wilma Rudolph was not able to get the professional care from hospital. Her mother had to send her 50 miles away from house twice a week for treatment for two years. The doctor told Mrs. Rudolph that Wilma would never walk, however, with the support and care from the whole family, Wilma learned to be a strong kid with the determination to be a "normal kid". By the age of 9, she shocked everyone by taking off the heavy steel braces fitted to her when she was 6 and started walking. By the age of 12, she could walk like a normal person without the help of any braces, crutches or corrective shoes. Shortly after one year, she played basketball and became the basketball star. Later, she emerged in track. Her talent was noticed by Ed Temple, a coach of Tennessee State University. She became the track star at the tender age of 16! She was qualified for the Summer Olympics in Melbourne, Australia and came home with a bronze medal. She received numerous awards and recognitions throughout and after her life:

  1. United Press Athlete of the Year 1960
  2. Associated Press Woman Athlete of the Year 1960
  3. James E. Sullivan Award for Good Sportsmanship 1961 *
  4. The Babe Zaharias Award 1962
  5. European Sportswriters' Sportsman of the Year *
  6. Christopher Columbus Award for Most Outstanding International Sports Personality 1960*
  7. The Penn Relays 1961 *
  8. New York Athletic Club Track Meet *
  9. The Millrose Games *
  10. Black Sports Hall of Fame 1980
  11. U.S. Olympic Hall of Fame 1983
  12. Vitalis Cup for Sports Excellence 1983
  13. Women's Sports Foundation Award 1984
  14. In 1993, she became the first recipient of President Clinton’s National Sport Award.
  15. In 1997, proclaimed June 23 as Wilma Rudolph Day in Tennessee
  16. In 2004, the United States Postal Service honored Wilma by featuring her likeness on a 23-cent stamp.The asterisk indicates that she was the first person to get the award.
*The asterisk indicates that she was the first person to get the award.

Here are some quotes from Wilma Rudolph:

“My doctor told me I would never walk again. My mother told me I would. I believed my mother.”

“Never underestimate the power of dreams and the influence of the human spirit. We are all the same in this notion: The potential for greatness lives within each of us.”

“The human will is the most incredible thing. I believe it is the human will that keeps us going, when everyone else expects us to sit, or even quit.”

“Winning is great, sure, but if you are really going to do something in life, the secret is learning how to lose. Nobody goes undefeated all the time. If you can pick up after a crushing defeat, and go on to win again, you are going to be a champion someday.”

At the age of 44, Rudolph passed away after the brain cancer gnawed at her for two years. In that two years, she never gave up to coach the underprivileged children. The Olympic flag was covered on the casket to appreciate her for the contribution.

Wilma Rudolph was not given the chance to choose when to come to this world, neither she had the chance to say "I do not want to have cancer"... However she chose to live to the end of her life bravely with the passing words "when confronted with adversity, you must meet it, greet it and defeat it!"

Many do not appreciate themselves by doing a lot of things to hurt themselves and some even worst, they end their own lives. However compared to Rudolph, they are far luckier actually. Many choose to end their lives actually because they lock themselves with seas of negative thoughts.

Therefore we should always remember Wilma Rudolph's passing words, "when confronted with adversity, you must meet it, greet it and defeat it!"
Or perhaps as what my friend put in her msn status, "We are not able to choose when to start our lives, but we must be brave enough to walk to the end of our lives!"

The followings are the links more about Wilma Rudolph:
Wilma Rudolph biography
Internation Olympic Committee-Athletes
Wilma Rudolph-Wilipedia
The My Hero Project

Thursday, March 22, 2007

Is it a miracle? Or is it a determination?

I've only 2-hour-lecture class every Thursday. I always feel like skipping the class as I go to my campus for 2 hours just for 1 lecture. However, I was glad as I didn't skip today's lecture. I learned something significant at the end of the lecture, a inspirational story which I feel strongly to share.

The lecturer started by asking us a few questions. Imagine how your life would be if you lost voluntary movements at the age of 21 and were diagnosed to have less than 3 years to live? It would be a lifeless life as there was no schooling, no sport, no career, no marriage, no friendship and no family.

2 catastrophes befell on Professor Stephen William Hawking in year 1963 and 1985 which were great setbacks. Professor Hawking was diagnosed with an incurable disease at the age of 21 which later was found out to be Amytrophic Lateral Sclerosis (ALS). He never expected that he could finish his PhD as he was told to have 3-year-live left. ALS is a fatal neurological disease that attacks neurons responsible for voluntary movements. Patients with ALS cannot perform any voluntary movements, suffer the difficult of breathing and experience problems with decision-making and memory. They may probably succumb to the breathing failure within 3-5 years from the onset of symptoms. It's unfortunate that the cause and sure of ALS are yet to be found.

What a miracle it is as Professor Hawking is still alive today and active after 44 years of being diagnosed with ALS.

In 1985, Professor Hawking caught pneumonia and he underwent an operation which removed all his ability to speak. The only way he could communicate was to spell out words letter by letter, by raising his eyebrow when someone pointed to the right letter on a spelling card. This was pretty hard and inconvenient. Later, a computer expert, Woltozs sent Professor Hawking his program called Equalizer which enabled Professor Hawking to use his only movable index finger to select word by pressing a single button. Then, David Mason of Cambridge Adaptive Communication fitted a small portable computer and speech synthesizer in Professor Hawking's wheelchair which made him able to speak up to 15 words per minute.

Professor Hawking got another 2 personal setbacks in year 1991 and 2006, as his first marriage to Jane failed due to his increasingly disabilities and his second marriage to Elaine Mason failed as a result of violence and abuse mentally and physically.

He got motivation from a dying boy in the hospital "I had been in hospital, I had seen a boy I vaguely knew die of leukaemia, in the bed opposite me. It had not been a pretty sight. Clearly there were people who were worse off than me. At least my condition didn't make me feel sick. Whenever I feel inclined to be sorry for myself I remember that boy."

Despite all these setbacks, Professor Hawking proved the Beginning and End of Universe scientifically, solved Black Hole Paradox and discovered Hawking's Radiation. Moreover, he has done numerous achievements and received many awards. He publishes many books as well.

Professor Hawking said his greatest achievement is ".... being alive today."

My lecturer ended the story by telling us "some people live for fortune, some people live for fame, some people live for power, but he lives for his dreams..."

My friend joked that because of Professor Hawking, he has to study the unfathomable Quantum Physics. In fact Professor Hawking's ideas are so advanced to be proven, and this is the reason he has not been awarded Nobel Prize(the recipient's findings must be proven).

Where there is a will, there is a way... I think this is what Professor Hawking believes and makes his life so meaningful...

I felt so embarrassing after listening to the story, as being a normal person with all the abilities given by God, I still lament this and that... As what I wrote in my previous post "What belongs to me", I think that the more we get into life, the more suffering we are... I was wrong, I should not be so greedy, I should be grateful of what I have. Perhaps the destination is not that important as long as we enjoy the process.

Here are some links of the website about Professor Stephen Hawking:

Welcome to Professor Stephen Hawking's Website

Stephen Hawking from Wikipedia

The Stephen Hawking Pages
Hawking Summary

Love, love, love

As what I post in my previous blog in Friendster, leaving Penang on 18/5/2006 to study in UTAR, PJ changed my life to quite a big extent. At first, I really could not accept lifestyle here(PJ), it was totally different from what I was having from the past 17 years. For example, I have to figure out what to eat everyday, have to wash my clothes, have to catch bus to my campus... Thank God to be there to help me leap every hurdle.. I'd say I'm still here because of LOVE.. Haha.. Yes, it's LOVE that makes me carry on my life...

Though leaving my family is really a setback, I learn how to appreciate them, how to love them more, how to be in their shoes.. No doubt, the relationship between me and my family is greatly enhanced. Papa, Mummy, Colin, Kine and Candice, I love you all... Their calls, or even their single sentence can make me cry(I am touched as they are there for me) and then continue to overcome any harshness I encounter...

Love from friends cannot be neglected as well.. No man is an island... I truly agree. Without them to go through all thick and thin with me, I may have gone back Penang to continue Form 6. Their ceaseless support is really like a harbor for me, for me to anchor to get a shelter from the stormy sea(PJ).. Hehe.. Again, I will mention Kelvin , Foong Kheng, Onn Sein, Karen, Shu Vien, Saimun, Patt Hong Tong and Soo Ping as they really mean a lot to me..

Committed love towards studies. I believe studies(or should I say knowledge) will aid me in the future. So I really try my best to strive for excellence(the only thing which is within my ability, others than that, I don't think I manage to do).

Love from lover.. So far, none, which is quite a sad case, but I believe in God who have arranged my Mr. Right for me.. It's just the timing problem..

Last but not least, love from God... Without God, I will not be here...

No love= No soul= No Jess

"Love doesn't make the world go 'round; love is what makes the ride worthwhile"

p/s: picture of my parents is not with me right now, will post it once my brother send me.. picture of God==>look at the sky, He is there

p/s 2: my parents' picture has been uploaded

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


There had been a surge of passion in adding a new post, but the passion stopped at my fingertip whenever I wanna start typing.. These few days I'd experienced quite many things, perhaps I'd lost self-control, I lost my rational thoughts... What happened to me? I'm having mixed feelings.. I'm confused...

Thursday, March 15, 2007

What Belongs to Me?

I'd been told that my previous two posts are rather general-type-issues. Some of my friends asked me to write something about myself...

I did try but I ended up finding myself to be so 'empty'... I have nothing, nothing, really nothing... I'm trying to seek the truth of life. For me, "life is like an onion, we peel it off one layer at one time, sometimes we weep..." The deeper we look into life, the more miseries we get... Birth, life, dead... The circle of life... It keeps going on whether you can accept or not...

There is no warranty for life. The happiness I have today may fade away the next day... The family, lover and friends I have will not permanently be there for me, they will leave me one day... There is nothing I can have for permanent, not even my life... Perhaps I should say 'life' instead of 'my life'... Because life does not belong to me as well...

Elbert Hubbard said,"Do not take life so seriously. You will never get out of it alive."

Is that true? I'm still seeking for the answer....

Saturday, March 10, 2007

contented man = richest man?

This afternoon I told one of my friends that I wish I can sleep less so that I can do more things I wish to do.. I even hope that I can sleep once every two days. For me, life is short, I wish I can do as many things as I could.

My friend then shared a story with me:

There was once 5 kids who gathered to play a 'wishing game'.
The 1st kid said he wanted an ice-cream.
The 2nd kid said he wanted to own a Mc-Donald so that he could have not only ice-creams, but burgers and french fries. The 1st kid blamed himself for not being smart enough.
The 3rd third kid said he wanted to have 1 million dolar, so that he can own a Mc-Donald and have many ice-creams. The 1st and 2nd kids blamed themselves after listening to the 3rd kid.
The 4th kid said he wanted to have 3 wishes so that he could wish for many things and the 3rd wish could let him make another 3 wishes. The first 3 kids were quiet as the 4th kids was too brilliant.
The last kid, the 5th kid said he wished he did not have any wish.
And the 5th kid won the game..

I was so curious and asked him why the 5th kid won the game.. He said "if you still have wishes, this means that you are still lacking of something. No more wish=contented=richest man in the world". "If you wish to have more wishes, this shows that your mind is not at peace", he added.

After listening to him, I'm wondering if human has no wish, will our world be as wonderful as it is now? We work hard to get what we wish and here it comes 'creations or inventions'... In my humble opinion, I feel that we still need wish to push us onward, but we can't be too obsessed until we lose our direction.

"He is richest who is content with the least, for content is the wealth of nature. ~Socrates"

p/s: What do you think about Bill Gate? Does he have any wish?

Thursday, March 8, 2007

4 flat!! So what?!!!

Can we judge a person's ability by one's results? My answer is a 'NO'.. Once, my friend told me result is the only objective yardstick to measure one's performance and ability.. Till now, i still disagree, I replied my friend "why must we carry on with this (wrong) perception, why don't we tell the world that result is a just a reference to measure one's ability.. It's just a reference....." As i step in University and observe people around me, i find out that everyone has his/her own talent and strength. You may laugh at me as I only know this at the age of 19... Funny.. However, I'd say I knew this long time ago, but I fully understand it now... Finishing higher education in University and getting a certificate are rather a so-called protocol to show our boss during interview.. I will not deny it'll be easier to get a job with a cert, but this never prove that we will secure the job.. According to Ms. Audrey(my sweet sweet lecturer), "4 flat? So what?!!! Colleagues will not ask how many A's we scored. The most important things are how we deal with people and how well we do our part." Bingo, that's right.. This is how we should be... In short, I think we should enjoy our University life as the same time absorb as much knowledge as possible to polish ourselves... Life is not always happy only with luxuries, it can be happy with simplicities... "
A man is not finished when he is defeated, he is finished when he quits.
"I can't change the direction of the wind, but I can adjust my sails to always reach my destination---Jimmy Dean."
So cheers....

The photo above was taken during birthday celebration with our sweet sweet lecturer, Ms Audrey..